What I want right now!

So I have decided to write a list of all the stuff I want, like a christmas list for my soul.



1.) I want a nice big  Alexa Mulberry bag in Cabbage green, because I love the design and I want to be like those snooty woman who ride the tube with their big, fat, Mulberry turning their noses up at of Coach bag girls.

2.) I also would like it if the frickin duck face'd photos all over my facebook feed from idiot girls who can't pose for a photo, would just disappear. Either that or the next girl who tries it get her lips twisted right up into her skull never to be seen again.

Really love those guys in the background, stupid crack hoe! 

3.) What would be amazing right now would be a calorie free double chocolate cake to fall from the sky onto a plate and into my mouth. I get so jelous over those friends of mine who claim "oh, I can eat whatever, I wont get fat its fine" "yeah, is it fine? Because right now I am wishing that somewhere in a lab a scientist has generated the "Fat Virus" and you get an infected cupcake". That would be just fabulous. 

Fat person porn, or anorexia vice either way I WANT IT! 

4) Would love to wake up an have a gorgeous Phillip Lim frock hanging in my wardrobe, and perhaps discover my super power is to make beautiful clothing appear before my eyes. 

Phillip Lim dress past season complements of shopbop

Free, Its all Free!?!?

The Old Vic tunnels where the venue will be held, taken from the Spoonfed website

Sarah Lucas, Famous for her work with self portraits, image taken from the Tate Modern site

 

Trasey Emins "My Bed" taken from her website. 

Planning my social calender for the next month I came upon a very deliteful website called "Spoonfed.co.uk" pretty awesome website full of fun things to do and know about London ( my bad for those of you who don't live here). I found a massive amount of free art exhibitions that are showcasing all over London.  One that did catch my eye was the "Mindful" enhibition in the 'Old Vic' tunnels, its supposed to be a very good evening out. There will be works by Tracey Emin,  Sarah Lucas, Sebastian Horsley (who tragically died last year), and several others.  So keep Monday the 26th open cause this is one underground show you wont want to miss! (No pun intended)

Sorry for the bad quality most of Sebastian Horsleys work in in film.

Holy Crap, Henry Holland, Viv. Westwood, and Jaeger!!

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Why, Oh why am I so lame that I  have not  found a comical yet affective way to get my tukus to LFW?!? Today three of my favorite, and the most well known designers were struting their stuff and here I am sitting at my boyfriends parents dinner table tucking into "Toad in the Hole" and "Taters". Thank Christoper Loyds underpants that I have the internet to fall back on. So here are a few mini reviews of Henry Holland and the lot.
House of Holland, Henry Holland's lovely design house, has decided to grace my life with its glorious splendor. His work this season is colorful, punchy, and just plain, wearable! I would love to get my hands on his white frock dress with black lace inlays. I swear I would actually punch my sister for it, well maybe not MY sister....but someones sister would most deffinately be getting a good 'pop' to the jaw! His creative use of texture combined with the clever use of color really made me want to mug a Kardashian ( well, actually maybe) everything about this collection made me think of fabulous wearabilty, which right now since the whole "Lady Gaga" ordeal we really need. There are too many of "HER" followers and not enough H.H enthusists.

Taken from the LFW website....mmmmmmmmm color

Well, as we all know Vivienne Westwood is a design essectric with a whole lot of amazing to give, I actually feel weak in the knees when presented with a handbag to sniff at my 'friendly' neighborhood Selffridges. Her 'jelly' shoes bring back such nostalgic childhood emotions, that tears stream down my face in a magnitude that could match that of a storm drain in rainy season. Her LFW runway show is a startling contrast to that of H.H. but its lavishness matches in contrast of his and perhaps beyond. Her creativity flows through her work creating the break down of structured stylized glamour that is overwhelmingly present this season. She by no means has thrown away the rule book, she has rewritten it.  

All photos taken from the LFW website 

                                  

Last on my list of lovelies is Jaeger London, leading designer is the great Stuart Stockdale, who has studied with the another design great although he has had a bit of an anti-sematic conundrum this last year, and is a Central Saint Martins alumni, CSM'MM kid aside he has turned his pretty little fingers to the "Jeager Brand" after a an amazing career on other labels, such as J.Crew and Pringle of Scotland. His runway collection at this years LFW are all about the "the glamour of 1960's/1970's travel" and the inspiration is there. Keeping to the heritage brands identity, he has recreated a few of Jeager's 1970's  looks bringing it into the 2000's with a  modern twist that is such a nessecity of the "right now" age.   Simple lines and elegant, vintage looks are kept in check by super modern laser cut outs and vibrant colors. 

Um, I do not actually WANT to see your tattoos.....

Ok, so I am out in Norwich last week looking for a vintage steamer chest to use in our new flat ( they make ah-mazeeee-ing coffee tables) and some random, weird, strung out looking fellow comes up to me spouting gibberish. I'm pretty dumbfounded at this point and I have no idea what the 'crap' is going on until he starts showing me various bits of pasty white flubs of skin of which held a few black stencilled  bits. It totally clicked after he started exposing himself to me and my boyfriend who didn't look to impressed I might add. This was not the first time I was harassed by an overtly keen weirdo with a few "tats" but it did make me realise that because I do have a tattoo in a pretty well seen part of my body ( my chest for those who do not know) that I'm now a member of the "Tattoo Crew" which pretty much means any one who spots another person with a tattoo will stop and thus start showing all of the places, and things they have been marked with. It really is like being in some secret society, and sometimes it is just "" who wanna look'see but most people who have stopped me in the street removed some article of clothing to reveal a misshapen cross, or really tacky butterfly. These people do not seem to faze me anymore because it seems  I am actually apart of a society where borderline sexual harassment  is tolerated because there actually was something there to be seen that was not genitalia.

 I do wonder what radomers would happen if people become like the "Tattoo Crew" and just started going up to people asking " Do you think my stomach abscess looks infected?" or "What do you think about this rash, do you think its herpes?". Would we become a more united group of people, perhaps friendlier because there would be people who would tell someone " Yeah, dude that looks infected" or " I really have no idea it could just be in-grown hairs?" and not have to be your friend to tell you that?  Not that I would ever go up to my buddies and ask whether this mole on my ass looks like skin cancer, but you get the idea. I do wonder if I could just go up to someone in random society and just start talking about my hairy back and get a general response that is not "Um...ew I do not want to see it again, who are you and why don't you have a shirt on?!"

   Pretty much what I am trying to say here is that I have no idea whether I enjoy "Tatt'd" freaks coming up to me and taking their clothes off, because the outcome of the situation ends with me standing in a public place with a half naked person closing in on me and pointing to various body parts. I also think that if its not acceptable to wonder up to strangers and start being friendly about their hair loss, I do not have to deal with these creepers.

All photos archived from google I do not own them or any such other stuff. 

Its London Fashion Week, and where am I?

Well its about that time again,its time for  London's most prestigious fashion exhibition and I am not there. Actually I am about two hours away in a sleepy little city of Norwich, Norfolk tucked away in my boyfriends room diddling about with his laptop as mine seems to be having issues. I have been in London three years now and still have not gone to London Fashion Week, as a Fashion journalist it is a bit of an issue. I do hate the awkward question people ask when I tell them my sought after profession and the deadly unbearably awkward question arises  " Ooh, have you been to Fashion Week yet? " my reply " err I have been to the building where they show it..?" queue nervous laugh and the fast walk.

   I have seen the runway line up and I am so jealous I can just spit! Erdem is going to be showing his collection for F/W this Monday! I love his work and its just not fair!! I know this because I have the "Evening Standard News" app, pretty handy and I do love the publication that and the LFW website has a very nice list I could print out, paste to my wall and cry in front of. Just one issue, WHO THE FLIP DOES THEIR SPELL CHECKING???? You would think that even as it goes online they would have some sort of system for spell check, but no.
 Anyway where was I , oh yeah, Erdem, I love his work its so wearable and has very flattering cuts which is pretty rare considering most designers make their ready-to-wear labels flattering for odd- shaped twigs and branches.


Paul Costelloe opened the fashion week today with an early nine am show I checked out his designs online at the www.LondonFashionWeek.co.uk website and found a fabulous slide show of his F/W collection. To me they seem a bit like inspired looks from the forties and seventies ( big eras at the moment hold on to those bat winged capes) with a crisp twenty- twelve tailoring we do like to see. Not at all a bad show, and I do love those modern dandy boys he hussied up in tailored trousers allowing for lovely clean silhouettes that he used for last years show. 


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                             To watch more, visit designer_profile.aspx?DesignerID=242 




Second in the line up today was Corrie Neilson, originally from Florida ( near my side of the pond, right on) and an Alumni of Central Saint Martins College of Arts. She won the Fashion Fringe award for twenty-ten, hand picked by John Galliano, she really knows her stuff. Her collection is an interesting combination of texture brought on by the Japanese inspiration collaborating with the charming high fashion of aristocracy in the nineteen hundreds. So in normal speak, gorgeous silk sashes and frothy fabrics making a subtle but sweet, and utterly delectable. You go Corrie! 




                                       
                        To watch more, visit designer_profile.aspx?DesignerID=1701  




Ok, ok so I may be getting a bit carried away with my ultra long list here. I am going to be giving my own little review of each collection, I mean if I can not be there I you best believe I am gonna stay up all night checking out the opening showcases. So it might get a bit tedious, but at least there is so much talent that I have something to talk about here. I am also filling up time because I am waiting for the big dogs to come out in the next couple of days. 




So London born Caroline Charles  has decided to grace the runways of LFW with her elegant and, simple designs. I actually love what she has done, kinda Great Depression chic with a bit more flavor. What really seems to be in this season are uncomplicated silhouettes and amazing texture, Mrs. Charles sure has brought that to the table. I do love the whole Bonnie and Clyde feel when she incorporates amazing mid-length skirts paired with silk blouses and topped with a jaunty bowlers hat. You get a real feel of appreciation for the decade as her models pin curls and muted make -up paint us a story of love, jazz, and liberation. 




                          

Moving on to a very nice couple brand as I like to call the collaboration between two designers to form a cognitive brand, and they are from my very own "London College of Fashion" alumni of course, it does give me a certain sort of radiant pride when I hear a fellow "LCF'er"  The pair known as Jena. Theo made up of both Jenny Holmes and Dimitris Theocharidis, have approached the 'bench' with fashion forward ingenuity and grace created such designs that form a delicate bubble of sparkling femininity. Fabrics of jersey and the sheerest cotton adorn the womanly curves of the models, who float down the runway a picturesque sight. The casual yet billowing elegance one would like to find in her closet, accompanied by the cosiest of textured knits with an eye for composite structuring. This runway collection is tough but with the softest of textures brings in back in for an accessible feminine look. 

                                         
                           To watch more, visit designer_profile.aspx?DesignerID=1419

Another CSM MA Alumni is Bora Asku a turkish born Londoner with a penchant for the romantic side of the dark. Think sultry Chamber maid with an upbeat modern twist. One to look out for in the future.

                                           
                                To watch more, visit designer_profile.aspx?DesignerID=57


Maria Grachvogal is a designer legend she founded her design house in 1994 and begin showing her work oat the LFW 1995. She works closer with fabrics and structured clothing that works extremely well with woman's bodies. Visit her website for more info.
www.mariagrachvogel.com 


Tune in tomorrow for the next overview of LFW's finest. xoxox 
Lacy 

When online facials go terribly wrong.

I was patrolling the internet two nights ago with the sole purpose of finding a great 'at home' facial mask recipe. I found quite a few websites related to the subject with dozens of interesting recipes to help stop the disagreeable act that is ageing, to help bring down a fever, to dry up those blasted acne spots and other such things. As I do tend to have spots and such things I decided it would be beneficial for me to try one that swears to bring down swelling and shrink those pustules. So I began my search thinking if I just pick one I would not be too disappointed as it is "at home" and there should not be too much that could go wrong. Right, famous last words.
  I came upon a recipe on some no name, no credential, website, I really should have researched more into it as if I was to search for it again I am sure it would have packed up shop for the sake of dodging lawsuits. I scrolled through the pages reading fab reviews from what I now know to be fictitious reviewers, until I found the "Baking Soda Rejuvenating Acne Mask". Well, these fake reviews had promoted it so much I felt that if I did not try it I would be letting the whole wide world of imaginary home beauty reviewers everywhere.
  As I am staying with my boyfriends parents at the moment, (he is here too) I inquired into the whereabouts of the "Baking Soda" and if I could have any. His Mother, although confused, said " yes, are you making a cake? " I replied " No I seem to need it to kill zits", grabbed it off the shelf bombed it into the bowl added some water and got to stirring. Right away I knew something was really not right, the baking soda was foaming and rising then turning into solids and repeating the process. Shrugging my shoulders I just trudged my way upstairs to the bathroom smeared that mess on. It had started to foam and rise on my face causing me to become a bit alarmed, so I added more water.

What m face looked like after my mishap with baking soda

  Right away I felt a stinging, burning sensation, I felt like I was on a thrush commercial. I was sitting down, fidgeting, walking around, standing in front of the fan where the cool air was rushing in, I was in pain. The only thing I was not doing was taking the crap off!! I was determined to keep this mask on for the full twenty minutes. Can you believe that my crazy self wanted to stand around with my face melting off for twenty mins?
After about five minutes I washed my broken face, with its poor splotchy, swollen, red bits floating down the drain. Of course this is an exaggeration but I was actually red in the face! Well if the recipe was made to suck out any form of moisture and dry up the face so much it cracked when I talked, then mission accomplished.
  Moral of the story? Do not ever decide that baking soda would make a fun and interesting paste to smear all over your face, it just burns. What I did  the very next day was get my tush down to *Lush Cosmetics to squeeze the sympathy factor into giving me samples of their face masks for free. So now my face is back to normal and smells of blueberries. For now on, I am gonna leave my face in the capable hands of the  professionals.

Lush's Catastopie Cosmetic, its best for every skin type and heals most problem skin, annnd it smells like blueberries.